Empowering Tools for Stress Management

Earlier today I attended a sisters only session by one of my favourite speakers, Ustadha Rayhaanah Omar on Empowering Tools for Stress Management. It was an hour-long session but despite the short time, she had shared a lot of very good points, I felt compelled to share it here with everyone. And here are some of the points which I had managed to write down. Hope it will be as beneficial to everyone of you, as much as it was to me. Happy reading!

Sister Rayhaanah started the session with a guided imagery and visualisation exercise. Although I won't go into the details of the exercise here (I mean seriously, how will you be able to read my writing if I asked you to close your eyes, right?) but she did share on how powerful are the Quranic verses and how clear they are in terms of their description of the plants, animals, our organs, the people of the past and what is to happen in the future. Some verses are so full of details that you can actually imagine with clarity what the Quran is conveying to you. Among the surah in the Quran which we can refer to is Surah Ar-Rahman. 

She also shared a dua'a: 

للّهُـمَّ أَنْـتَ السَّلامُ ، وَمِـنْكَ السَّلام ، تَبارَكْتَ يا ذا الجَـلالِ وَالإِكْـرام

"O Allah, You are As-Salam and from You is all peace, blessed are You, O Possessor of majesty and honour."

(As-Salam means The One Who is free from all defects and deficiencies.)

Remind yourself, "Allah is enough." And ask yourself, "Am I achieving the pleasure of Allah?" In life, we have choices to make. We have to take risks and we fear losing. There are similarities between risk and rizq. Rizq comes in many different forms, and not merely in financial gains. 

Ask from The One whose treasures never end. Abu Hurairah r.a. narrated that the Prophet Muhammad p.b.u.h. said that: "A strong believer is better and is more lovable to Allah than a weak believer, and there is good in everyone, (but) cherish that which gives you benefit (in the Hereafter) and seek help from Allah and do not lose heart, and if anything (in the form of trouble) comes to you, don't say: "If I had not done that, it would not have happened so and so, but say: "Allah did that what He had ordained to do and your "if" opens the (gate) for Satan."

Sister Rayhaanah also shared 5 dua'a life hacks that we can use in our daily lives: 

1. Begin every task with the name of Allah by saying, 

﷽‎

"In the name of Allah, the Beneficent, the Merciful."

2. Sometimes you need to choose between 2 things, say, 

"O Allah, destine good for me and choose for me."

3. When overwhelmed, make this dua'a, 

رَبِّ اِنِّىْ مَغْلُوْبٌ فَانْتَصِرْ

"O' Allah, I am overwhelmed, so help me."

4. Ask for goodness and when something good happens, don't stop from making dua'a. Keep on asking, 

رَبِّ إِنِّي لِمَا أَنزَلْتَ إِلَيَّ مِنْ خَيْرٍ فَقِيرٌ

"My Rabb, surely I am in need of any good that you have given to me."

5. If you want to get rid of a problem in your life, pray two rakaahs and during sujood, supplicate with the dua'a which was recited by Prophet Jonah (or Yunus) and then make the dua'a for Allah to give you a way out to your problem. 

لَّا إِلَهَ إِلَّا أَنتَ سُبْحَانَكَ إِنِّي كُنتُ مِنَ الظَّالِمِينَ

How do we deal with stress? Two ways: (1) by making dua'a, and (2) by praying and asking Allah of what you need. Keep on asking and don't stop. Recite this dua'a:

اللَّهُمَّ رَحْمَتَكَ أَرْجُو فَلَا تَكِلْنِي إِلَى نَفْسِي طَرْفَةَ عَيْنٍ وَأَصْلِحْ لِي شَأْنِي كُلَّهُ لَا إِلَهَ إِلَا أَنْتَ

 "O' Allah, it is Your mercy that I hope for, so do not leave me in charge of my affairs even for a blink of an eye, and rectify for me all of my affairs. None has the right to be worshipped except You."

When we're stressed, if we are not careful, we can lose our faith. Therefore, we should always reflect back on the concept of tawhid in Islam and affirm our belief in Allah. These dua's are affirmations of the oneness of Allah. When faced with difficulty, know that Allah is with you. 

How can dua'a change from a mindset of stress to calmness?

First, know that it's okay to feel emotions. Emotions are from Allah. However, whether you choose to be enslaved to those emotions, then that is your choice to either be empowered or disempowered by the emotions. 

Secondly, when going through stress, your imaan is the one that suffers. That's why when stressed, people would say, "My imaan is at a low." The heart is such that it flips. Check back with ourselves, are we neglecting our faith? Are we distancing ourself from the Almighty?

So what should we do?

Examine our relationship with Allah. In Surah Taha, it is mentioned that, "And whoever turns away from My remembrance - indeed, he will have a depressed life, and We will gather him on the Day of Resurrection blind." (20: 124). When we are stressed and overwhelmed, and we are not feeling joy in what we do, reflect in our relationship with Allah. Ask ourself, "What is the state of my solat/ Quran/ fasting/ charity etc?"

As the hadith of the Prophet Muhammad p.b.u.h. states, "Amazing is the affair of the believer, verily all of his affair is good and this is not for no one except the believer. If something of good/ happiness befalls him, he is grateful and that is good for him. If something of harm befalls him, he is patient and that is good for him." 

Allah purifies you when you feel stressed, pain, overwhelmed or when any sorrow befalls you, as mentioned in this hadith, "No fatigue, nor disease, nor sorrow, nor sadness, nor hurt, nor distress befalls a Muslim, even if it were the prick he receives from a thorn, but that Allah expiates some of his sins for that."

To conclude, know that we are bound to be tested. We are made to be stretched out of our comfort zone. As difficult as it is, we all do at some point in our life. And realise that everyone is experiencing a test differently than we do. Even Maryam, the mother of Isa, lamented on the test that she was facing as mentioned in the Quran in Surah Maryam, "... She said, "Oh, I wish I had died before this and was in oblivion, forgotten." (19: 23)

In times of difficulty, things may not be as they seem, such as the tests which were faced by Prophet Ibrahim and the fire, Prophet Yunus and the whale, Prophet Musa's mother after his birth, Aisyah and the slander and Prophet Yusuf thrown into a well, left to die. Strive for that will benefit you, and seek the help of Allah. Remember that when you breath in, your breath is from Allah and when you breath out, your breath returns to Allah, as is your life in this dunya.

On this note, I'd like to share two reminders which I've set as the home screen and lock screen on my phone: 

I'll put them up in my Facebook page so that you can download and use them if you like.

So those were the points that I've gained from the talk and if I've made any mistakes, do let me know by commenting below this post and I'll make changes where necessary. Thank you to the organisers for making the talk possible and thank you to Sister Rayhaanah for sharing all the gems with us today. All praise be to Allah for making everything possible.

And for those who would like to know more on Ustadha Rayhaanah's work, do visit her website [here].


xoxo Mrs Fashionista

Fashionista's University Review: INCEIF, Malaysia

This is my first university review.

And (I hope), there'll be many more to come. Inshaa Allah.

I've always wanted to do my PhD and I think that this has to do with the fact that both my parents are PhD holders (in an age without google, science direct, elsevier, emerald insight *gasp*) and when I first made the decision to study at INCEIF, I wasn't able to gain more information on the university except for the university's website, official twitter and official Facebook page. So, I hope this post will help future students of INCEIF gain insight on how it feels like to study at INCEIF.

Firstly, what is INCEIF?

INCEIF is a university that offers programs exclusively in the field of Islamic finance (and nothing else) so it is basically a meeting point that brings together a group of scholars (professors, associate professors, lecturers, tutors etc) and students who are involved (or would like to be involved in) the field of Islamic finance. The name, INCEIF is actually a short form for International Centre for Education in Islamic Finance.
There's not that many programs in INCEIF (because of its specialised nature) and all programs are postgraduate programs (i.e. they offer masters and PhD programs only). This is good (in my opinion) because the students basically already have done their undergraduate somewhere else (so they're not green out of high school), the classrooms are small and cosy (the maximum number of students in a class is about 40, but that would be rare, usually depending on the subject, there'd be around 6 to 20 students in a class), and due to the small setting, the relationship among the students and their professors are more intimate (in a sense its easier for you to develop a close relationship among your classmates and get to know each other well, and also it's easier for you to approach your professors because there's only a small group of students in the class and it's also easier for him or her to address any questions in and out of the classroom).
The university itself is located right next to Universiti Malaya at Lorong Universiti A (right off Jalan Universiti, the small road where KFC is located) so if you're a travelling student (like I was in the first semester), to get to the university you can take a cab for RM7 from University Station or wait for the shuttle (INCEIF provides free shuttle service at scheduled hours) at Taman Jaya Station.
There's only three buildings, one is the academic building (where the library, classes and academicians are located) and the other two building are for administration, bursary, and ISRA researchers.

Secondly, why INCEIF?

I chose INCEIF simply because it offers only Islamic finance programs which is the area of research that I would like to specialise in (there're other universities that offer PhD in Islamic finance such as IIUM, UNITAR and UiTM which you can check out if you like) and also because I knew that because of it's specialised nature, I'd be mingling with people who already are (and are hoping to be) involved in the area of Islamic finance. Thus I would be learning about Islamic finance and also be able to network and hear on what is actually happening in the field from those who are working in the industry.
Another reason for me to select INCEIF is because the PhD research program is coupled with courses (i.e. I'd have to pass the courses and also a comprehensive exam before undertaking my PhD research), I feel that the courses would help me to enhance my understanding in the different aspects that are related to Islamic finance such as Islamic capital markets, Islamic accounting, Islamic economics, risk management, etc and this would provide me with a broader view of Islamic finance compared to if my PhD is involved strictly in research.

What have I experienced so far?

What I genuinely like about the university is the atmosphere. I love the fact that the students are always so helpful with each other and there's a certain brotherhood (or sisterhood) feeling that you get with each other.

Here are some photos of my experience at INCEIF:

New students' registration are usually accompanied by orientation day and this was my orientation day. This is Daud Vicary Abdullah, the President and CEO of INCEIF.

A typical classroom at INCEIF. This photo was taken during our Tajweed session with brother Ziyaad Muhammad. 

Fiqh Muamalat class with Assoc. Prof. Ahcene Lahsasna.

A typical class discussion between students and their Professor. This one was taken during Islamic Economics class where brother Alam Asadov was discussing on gold dinar with Prof. Zubair Hasan.

Sometimes we have Professorial Lectures. So this one was taken off Prof. Abbas Mirakhor's discussion of the book by Thomas Piketty, Capital in the 21st Century.

Sometimes we also have visiting Professors giving talks to us, this one is Sheikh Prof Dr Ali Muhyi Al-Din Ali Al-Quradaghi. It was in Arabic so Assoc. Prof. Ahcene became his interpreter.

We also have bankers coming to share on what's happening in the industry. This is Dato' Mohd Redza  Shah Abdul Wahid explaining to us on what's in the pipeline for investment accounts (post IFSA 2013).

We also have Fire Drills...

And visits from other universities. These are my students from UiTM and I am glad to say that one of these students will be joining INCEIF to do his masters next semester =).

PhD Colloquiums are also held once every few months.

And dedicated syndicate rooms for group discussions 

For more information on INCEIF, feel free to check out their website [here], Facebook page [here] and twitter [here].

To life-long learning


xoxo Mrs Fashionista