Happy Mother's Day!

When I think of Mother's Day, I am always reminded by this quote by Abraham Lincoln:

"All that I am, or hope to be, I owe to my angel mother." 

Me and my mum in Yogyakarta. She came to accompany me for an academic conference because hubs wasn't able to join me.

As a mother myself, I am always reminded of all the joy and love I feel for my daughters. The hopes and dreams that I have for them, the prayers that I make so that they are not only be successful in this worldly life, but also be good and pious Muslims, and attain success in the afterlife as well. Which is why I was affected by a post on social media which I read a few days ago from a daughter who is obviously unhappy with the relationship that she has with her mother.

As Muslims, we learn that we should always strive to maintain a good relationship with our parents (especially to our mothers). This is apparent in a number of hadith by the Prophet Muhammad p.b.u.h.:

A man came to the Prophet and said, ‘O Messenger of God! Who among the people is the most worthy of my good companionship? The Prophet (PBUH) said: Your mother. The man said, ‘Then who?’ The Prophet said: Then your mother. The man further asked, ‘Then who?’ The Prophet said: Then your mother. The man asked again, ‘Then who?’ The Prophet said: Then your father. (Bukhari, Muslim)

A man once consulted the Prophet Muhammad about taking part in a military campaign. The Prophet asked the man if his mother was still living. When told that she was alive, the Prophet said: “(Then) stay with her, for Paradise is at her feet.” (Al-Tirmidhi)

On another occasion, the Prophet said: “God has forbidden for you to be undutiful to your mothers.” (Sahih Al-Bukhari)

However, not everyone are blessed with a good relationship with their mothers or even with their parents.  There may be times where we may not be at the best of relationships with our mother (or both our parents). For some of you, like the post on social media that I read, may be estranged or in a difficult relationship with your mother (or both parents or other family members).

Do you know that our Prophets also have been tested with strained family relationships? Here are some examples:

Prophet Adam a.s. had a son who killed the other.

Prophet Nuh a.s. who even as his son was in the water did not accept his call to Islam. His son later drowned.

Prophet Nuh and Lut whose wives are non-believers.

Prophet Ibrahim a.s. whose father threw him in the fire.

Prophet Yaacob a.s. whose sons had a hatred so deep against their own brother i.e. Prophet Yusuf that they would lie to their own father so that they could kill Prophet Yusuf.

Prophet Yusuf a.s. whose brothers conspired to kill him and threw him in a well with the hopes that he would die.

Prophet Muhammad p.b.u.h. whose uncles (Abu Lahab and Abu Jahl) constantly mocked him and also conspired to kill him.

The thing that I've learnt from our Prophets is that, they have never wished bad things for their family members whom they are estranged from. Prophet Ibrahim a.s. tirelessly prayed for his father to accept Islam (Surah Maryam, verses 41 - 48) while Prophet Yusuf a.s. forgave his brothers and invited them to stay with him in Egypt (Surah Yusuf, verse 99).

We are not perfect and nor are we prophets. But we do strive to follow from the best example and the best example that we have is our Prophet Muhammad p.b.u.h.

Let us take heed from this hadith by the Prophet Muhammad p.b.u.h.:

"The best of you is the best to his family and I am the best amongst you to my family."

May Allah protect our Mothers (and our Fathers too) and make them among the people of Jannah. May Allah protect our relationship with our family and forgive us all for our wrongdoings and keep us on the straight path. Ameen.

Alexa's handwritten Mother's Day card which she gave to me yesterday. Thank you to E'en and Eqa for helping her with the card =).

Happy Mother's Day everyone!


xoxo Fareiny

New year, new blog and a not-so-new, me!

*cough*cough*

Hello there! 

It's been a year and here I am dusting the cobwebs on my blog, trying to figure out whether I should continue blogging or just continue leaving it as it is and pursue my other non-interests such as wiping snot off Alexa's nose or changing Isabel's diapers now that she's pooped for the third time in the same day (kidding!).

It's challenging being a working mom. Though in good times and bad times, Allah's plans are the best of plans, Alhamdulillah.  May Allah protect them from all that is evil and make them strong like Khadijah a.s. (the wife of our Prophet Muhammad p.b.u.h.). Ameen!

Anyway, since I've been away from the blogging space, my thoughts on I should be writing this and that, unfortunately, refuse to leave me, for I do love writing. So here we are, back here, with me thinking of the things that I should write more of and trying to fit blogging into my already packed schedule. 

Ah well, I've made up my mind and hopefully you'll see more of me (my writing at least), in this space. 

Until then, love and positivity always!

xoxo Fareiny

2015 in Review

So here we are again, having arrived at the last day of the year. This time, I'm making it a point to blog on my year and what's happened so far. 

Here's a photoblog of my year:

Travel wise:

I've traveled to three countries this year, China, Indonesia and Singapore for various reasons. Our trip to Xi'an, China is one of our (me and hubs) attempt at spending quality time together and make memories that will hopefully enrich our relationship. The trip to Banda Aceh, Indonesia is my mum's birthday gift to my dad, he's been keen on seeing how Banda Aceh has developed after the tsunami. And for Singapore, it wasn't a leisurely trip, instead we went to Singapore just for a short weekend to attend one of Al-Maghrib seminars last January and left right after the seminar ended.

Another one of my aim is to explore as many places as I can in Peninsular Malaysia. Coming from the island of Borneo, we would have to fly to Kuala Lumpur or any other cities in the peninsular, therefore we usually do not explore much of this part of Malaysia as most of our travels/ holidays tend to focus on traveling overseas. This time I've resolved to change all that and I've kinda made a list of places that I hope to visit in the peninsular before I complete my PhD. 

Visited Xi'an, China and the famed terracotta warriors.

Us posing with the terracotta warriors. 

Alexa's growing to be a frequent traveler and she's much more comfortable on long flights and adapted well to traveling, Alhamdulillah.

Us having a stroll on our last day in Xi'an.

Visited Banda Aceh, Indonesia and got to see first hand the after effects of the tsunami.

Lampuuk Beach. Beautiful, but deadly.

Aimed to visit more local destinations in Malaysia. This is Sabah Tea Plantation, Ranau, Sabah.

Slept in a bamboo longhouse at the tea plantation.

The room came with a traditional mosquito netting. Definitely this is one of my most novel and exciting travel experiences.

Visited Sepanggar Island, Kota Kinabalu, Sabah. One of the most beautiful and private beach that I've ever been to so far. You can read all about my trip to Sepanggar island [here].

Walked on a canopy walkway at Poring Hotspring, Ranau, Sabah.

I actually went up in my pyjama pants. Haha! There's always a first time for everything =)

Another local destination in Malaysia, Perhentian Islands, Terengganu.

Went snorkelling with the fishes and turtles at Perhentian Islands. [Here's] my blogpost on my trip to Perhentian Islands.

Another local destination, Cameron Highlands, Pahang. Went strawberry picking with my university mates.

And obviously, one shall not miss the Boh Tea Plantations at Cameron Highlands. The breakfast here is one of the best highlights to my year. You can read all about my trip to Cameron Highlands [here].

Another local destination, Colmar Tropicale, Bukit Tinggi, Pahang with the family. trip. [Here's] a photoblog of the trip.

Health Wise:

Like most women, every year my aim is to reduce weight. However, this year, I've stopped making that goal as part of my new year resolutions and instead concentrate on improving my fitness level. So to do that, I've made a list of activities that I want to do and focused on ticking them off my list. Among the activities that I've set out to do is conquer Broga and another hill (which later turned out to be Bukit Gasing), try out Jumpstreet and Skytrex Adventure. Besides that, I've also enrolled myself in a couple of marathons as a way to motivate myself to exercise. 

One of my aims this year is to improve on my health and fitness, so I went on several hiking trips with my friends. This one is our hike to Broga last November. [Here's] a blogpost on my hike at Broga.

And Bukit Gasing just last week. [Here's] a photoblog of the hike up Bukit Gasing.

Went for my first run after giving birth to Alexa, two years ago. This one is the 3.8 km Stroller Run at Kepong Metropolitan Park in November.

Another run just last week, 5km Garfield Run 2015.

Went to the Jumpstreet, the trampoline park in Petaling Jaya. I will definitely come again to improve on my jumping skills. And [here's] my review of Jumpstreet.

And went to Skytrex Adventure for some adrenaline rush and test our fitness levels. You can read all about Skytrex Adventure [here].

Profession Wise:

I am currently on study leave by my institution. Therefore most of my professional achievements will involve my academic performance and my ability to achieve what I've set out to do. So far I've completed all my necessary courses and the huge Comprehensive Exam (CE) this year. And I've been able to publish one of my assignments as an article in an Islamic finance bulletin/ magazine and also present in two conferences this year. Next year I hope to be able to present in a couple more conferences and be published in journals as well, inshaa Allah.



The IIBF - Inceif Student Conference.

Passed my Comprehensive Exam (CE) in November this year. The CE is one of Inceif's requirements prior to embarking on your PhD research and you can only sit for the CE once you have passed at least six out of seven courses, i.e. Islamic Economics, Islamic Banking or Islamic Capital Markets, Corporate Finance, Usul Fiqh and Qawaid Fiqhiyyah, Islamic Law of Contracts and Fiqh Muamalat. 

Completed my final course just two weeks ago. For Inceif, there are two PhD tracks that a student can embark on, PhD by Research or PhD by Coursework and Dissertation. Both tracks require students to sit for a number of courses. My PhD is the one by coursework and dissertation. We are required to sit for at least 13 courses aside from our PhD research. Alhamdulillah I've completed my final two courses this semester. So starting from next semester, I can simply focus on my research. 

Religion Wise:

Since last year, I've tried to make it a point that any improvements that I make for my career/ profession, I should at the same time improve in my religious knowledge as well. With that in mind, I've enrolled myself as a student at Al-Maghrib Institute and this year I've managed to attend three of their courses. Alhamdulillah I've managed to pass their exams as well.

The first course that I attended this year was the Fiqh of Chillin': Entertainment and Recreation in Islam by Shaykh Saad Tasleem.

The second course which I attended in Singapore was Deception: Study of Shaytaan, also by Shaykh Saad Tasleem.

The third course which I attended in October was Lost in Translation: The Art of Contemplating the Quran by Shaykh Ahsan Hanif. All of Al-Maghrib's courses are amazing, but this one is among my favourite.

Finished reading Yasmin Mogahed's book, Reclaim Your Heart and Women Around the Messenger by Muhammad 'Ali Qutb.

Finished reading a book by Fazlur Rahman entitled Major Themes of the Qur'an. Not an easy read, but it does give some pretty good insight on the Qur'an. 

All in all I would have to say it's been quite a productive year. I can't believe I was able to complete all those things but then again, life is pretty amazing, if you really bother to sit down and just make a list of what's important to you. Looking forward to an exciting year ahead, and I do think (from the looks of it) that 2016 might just be one of my most challenging year ever (I know we haven't even started the first day of 2016 yet but I do think it's going to be quite tough for me as I only have 8 more months to go to complete my research before I have to report duty back to my institution).

But then again, it's only with life's challenges that we grow as a person and one thing that I always keep close to my heart is that, "Allah tests those whom He loves." May Allah's love increase for me (and you too), Ameen. 

Happy New Year, everyone!

xoxo Mrs Fashionista

Fashionista Mommy Adventures: Parenting Matters Part II

So here we are at Day 2 of the course and here's another gem that I'd like to share, something that Islam has always emphasised on us, i.e. lineage. According to a hadith, the Prophet Muhammad p.b.u.h. said that a woman should be married based on four (4) things, which among them is her lineage. The speaker shared many stories on the lineage of some very notable scholars and leaders of our time. Let me retell those story.

Story # 1: Caliph Umar ibn 'Abd al-'Aziz 

Narrated `Abdullah ibn Zayd ibn Aslam, from his father, from his grandfather, who said: When I was accompanying `Umar ibn al-Khattab (radi Allahu ‘anhu) on his patrol of Madinah at night, he felt tired, so he leant against a wall. It was the middle of the night, and (we heard) a woman say to her daughter, “O my daughter, get up and mix that milk with some water.” The girl said, “O Mother, did you not hear the decree of Amir al-Mu’minin today?” The mother said, “What was that?” The girl said, “He ordered someone to announce in a loud voice that milk should not be mixed with water.” The mother said, “Get up and mix the milk with water; you are in a place where `Umar cannot see you.” The girl told her mother, “I cannot obey Him (Allah) in public and disobey Him in private.” `Umar (radi Allahu ‘anhu) heard this, and told me: “O Aslam, go to that place and see who that girl is, and to whom she was speaking, and whether she has a husband.” So I went to that place, and I saw that she was unmarried, the other woman was her mother, and neither of them had a husband. I came to `Umar (radi Allahu ‘anhu) and told him what I had found out. He called his sons together, and said to them: “Do any of you need a wife, so I can arrange the marriage for you? If I had the desire to get married, I would have been the first one to marry this young woman.” `Abdullah said: “I have a wife.” `Abd al-Rahman said: “I have a wife.” `Asim said: “I do not have a wife, so let me marry her.” So `Umar arranged for her to be married to `Asim. She gave him a daughter, who grew up to be the mother of `Umar ibn `Abd al-`Aziz (rahimahullah) who was called 'Umar al Thani (the second 'Umar).

Story # 2: Imam Abu Hanifa

It is narrated that in the first century of the Hijra Calendar  there lived a pious man who constantly looked for knowledge and used to give all his time to this cause but he was poor. One day he left home due to his extreme hunger since he had found nothing to eat at home and so he ended up heading towards one of the gardens on the roadside. This garden was full of apple trees and one of which had a few of its branches hanging outside the fence on the roadside. His inner self started whispering to him to eat an apple to remove his hunger and that no one would see him. After all the apple garden wouldn't be affected by the absence of only one apple. He plucked an apple and sat down to eat it until his hunger disappeared. But when he went back home, his consciousness (al nafs) started aching him and he started to ask himself how he could do such a thing (this is always the case of a mukmin, a believer i.e he always judges and punishes his soul for the wrongdoings he does). Sitting down, he started asking himself how he could eat an apple which is of another Muslim's wealth and possession and yet he never asked his permission before plucking it. Neither had he asked the owner for his forgiveness. Getting up the next morning, he headed outdoor in search of this garden's owner until he found him. This young man then told him (the owner), "Uncle, yesterday extreme hunger got great hold of me and I ate an apple from your garden without you knowing and today I have come to ask for your permission for having taken it." 
The owner replied, "By Allah I will not forgive you.. In fact I am angry from you until the Day of Judgement where I will complain to Allah about you." 

The young lad then started crying and pleading to him to forgive him and that he was ready to do anything for him on condition that he forgives him and makes him clean of sins again through this forgiveness. He continued pleading and the owner refuses and grows more and more stubborn insisting on his point. Leaving the garden, the young lad followed at his heels pleading that he change his mind until finally this owner arrived at his own home, entered and closed the door. The young lad remained waiting by the door in anticipation of seeing him once again when Asr prayer would come when he had to leave for prayers. When at last,the owner came out, he found the lad still standing outside the door with tears streaming down his beard making his face glow with more light(noor) than the light of Iman (faith) and knowledge which had already previously prevailed on his face. 

The lad, "Uncle, I am ready to work as a garden worker in this garden of yours without a salary the whole of my life or any other thing you wish me to carry out for you on condition that you forgive me." 

At this moment, the garden owner stopped to think for a while and then said, "Son, I am ready to forgive you now but on one condition...." 

The lad got so happy and his face once again got filled with joy and he replied, "Give me any condition you wish, uncle." 

The owner, "My only condition is that you marry my daughter!!!" 

The lad was shocked from this condition,got stunned and couldn't understand this condition. 

The owner continued, "But son... you must know that my daughter is blind, deaf and cannot talk. She doesn't walk either and is always sitted. For a long time now, I have been searching for a husband for her whom I can trust to take care of her and accept her as she is with all her features which I mentioned to you. I will forgive you only if you accept to marry her." 

The lad was once again shocked with this second disaster. He then started thinking how he would be able to live with such a burden especially that he was still young and on his first steps in his career life. How could she take care of him and look after his house when she had such defects? He then started telling himself, "Have patience regarding her and at least get saved from the Hereafter's punishment which this apple would cause you." 

He then looked towards the owner and said, "Uncle, I have accepted your daughter and I ask Allah to reward me well for my intention and that He rewards me with something better than what He inflicted me with." 

The owner replies, "Well then son....your date is next Thursday at my place for the Walimah (celebration) of your marriage and I will be responsible (take care) of her Mahr (dowry)." 

When Thursday came, this young lad came walking with heavy steps, full of sorrow, with a broken heart unlike any other groom on his wedding day. When he knocked on the door, her dad opened the door and let him in. After they had sat and talked a bit, the bride's dad told the lad, "Please feel free to enter the room where your bride is sitted..and may Allah place His baraka (blessings) on you both and around you both. May He bring onto both of you all goodness and mercy .." 

He then took him by his hand and led him to the room where his daughter sat waiting. When he opened the door and looked inside, the lad found seated a girl whose face was whiter than the moon and whose hair hang loosely on her shoulders like silk. She then got up and walked towards him with her shoulders stretched outwards and told him, "Assalamu Alaikum my husband." 

Standing in his place, the lad stood staring at her as if he was in front of a hooreya (i.e one of the beautiful ladies of Paradise who have never lived on Earth before) from the hooreyats of Jannah who had instead come to earth. He couldn't believe his eyes and just didn't know what had happened or why her dad had said such bad things about her. She at once understood what was going through his mind and at once went nearer to him, held his hand and kissed it saying, "I am blind from looking towards forbidden (haram) things and I am deaf from listening to forbidden talk and I am unable to talk about forbidden things. My feet too do not walk towards haram things.... I am the only child of my dad and for a couple of years now, my dad has been searching for a good pious husband for me. So when you came to him asking his permission for an apple and weeping for its sake, he told me: 'Whoever fears from eating an apple for which he hasn't asked permission for acquiring it, then he will sure look after my daughter and fear Allah in treating her badly'......so congratulations to me for having you as a husband and congratulations to my dad for having you as his son-in-law." 

(They would later have a son named Nu'man aka Imam Abu Hanifa (ra))

Story # 3: Abdullah ibn Zubayr and Umar al-Khattab

A son of the Hawwariyy al-Rasul, Zubayr ibn al-`Awwam, and Abu Bakr's daughter, Asma’. He was the first child to be born of the Muhajirun at Madinah in 1 H. The Prophet (saws) placed a chewed date in the infant’s mouth when he was presented to him after birth, and named him `Abdullah. Once children playing in the street saw `Umar ibn al-Khattab coming towards them, they fled in fear – except Ibn Zubayr. `Umar asked him why he hadn’t fled. He replied, “Neither have I committed a wrong, nor is the street too narrow. So why should I run away?” `Umar was pleased with the courageous reply. 

So, what does this tell us? It tells us that our children are a reflection of who we are. They become our mirror. So if you want children who are good, pious, God-fearing, then make sure you are one, then your children will follow suit. Going back to lineage, wouldn't you want your descendants to be a leader like Umar ibn 'Abd al-'Aziz, a scholar like Imam Abu Hanifa or courageous like Abdullah ibn Zubayr? 

Why is our children so important to us? This is because, based on the hadith of the Prophet p.b.u.h., when a man dies, his good deeds come to an end, except three: ongoing charity, beneficial knowledge and righteous offspring who will pray for him. Thus it is definitely in our favour to raise righteous children.  

Another analogy that the speaker gave was, imagine if the Prophet Muhammad p.b.u.h. were to visit you in your home, would you change your tv channel? Would you change the clothes that you are wearing? Would you speak in a different manner? Thus if you want to be in Jannah with the Prophet, make sure you lead a lifestyle that befits a neighbour of the Prophet p.b.u.h.

xoxo Mrs Fashionista

Fashionista Mommy Adventures: Parenting Matters

So here I am, always ending up to find myself attending a course here and there in KL. And I think that's only because KL has all these fantastic courses with an equally impressive line up of speakers that I feel that I wouldn't be doing justice to myself if I were not to be in attendance. Today, and tomorrow as well, I am attending Al-Kauthar's Parenting Matters, The Art of Raising Righteous Children Seminar. 

Okay, the seminar has not ended, but I am indeed very, very excited to write on one parenting method which the speaker, Sheikh Alaa Elsayed has shared with us this afternoon (and this explains the sudden motivation to blog, because if I don't, I might forget it). Among the various methods that we can use to nurture a child's development, i.e. storytelling, direct and open communication, encouragement, praise etc etc, is one term which is called "word association". 

Children normally look up to their parents and people who are close to them such as the grandparents, maid, school teacher, classmates, cousins etc, therefore whatever we do and say in front of them would have an effect to how they perceive the world. For example, if we were awed by a stunt which we had watched in the tv or movie, and then praised the actor for doing such a good job/ stunt, children would associate doing similar activities as something praiseworthy and then try to imitate such actions. That is why nowadays we see there are numerous videos on YouTube of children as young as 2 years old being able to dance like Beyonce, do karate like Bruce Lee and retell the Red Riding Hood tale from memory. It is simply due to practice (of course) and the praise of their parents/ guardians on how great they were doing those stuff. 

Children live by praise and they absolutely love to be praised (as would any other normal human beings), it's just that as adults we tend to take a more humble approach when someone comes up and gives us praise. Therefore to encourage (or discourage) them, we should be aware of the words that we use, as children would then associate those words and give them meaning. For example, if you would like your child to have a good role model (which you want them to look up to) then you should relate your praise to that role model. Let's say you want them to take on the Prophet Muhammad p.b.u.h. as an example, then associate what they are doing with what the Prophet does. If they share their toys/ food with another child, then you can say, Mashaa Allah, you are following in the footsteps of the Prophet for he also love to share his food with his companions. Then you could perhaps end the praise with a story of the Prophet. Similarly, if you want to stop them from doing an act like shouting and screaming, then if you catch them shouting and screaming (and even fighting) say astaghfirullah, and explain why we don't scream or shout to each other. The child would then associate the words Mashaa Allah with a good act and astaghfirullah with a bad act. 

Similarly, for parents who would like to encourage their child to become doctors, engineers, or even religious scholars, you could start by adding the title "Dr/ Engineer/ Sheikh etc" before their name. However, other parents might find this to be suffocating to the child or even cause excessive pressure towards the child so proceed with caution. In my opinion, it would be a good thing, i.e. positive reinforcement is always a good thing, but only if I feel that my child is comfortable with the title. If he or she looks uncomfortable, then maybe we can discuss about the matter and drop the title. Knowing kids, the girls would definitely go to various phases such as Princess, then Doctor, then Engineer, whatever. Which is not a problem. But make sure you are guiding your child towards becoming a more confident individual who knows that he or she is capable to achieving their goal and knows how to go about it (with the help of supportive parents, of course). 

In regards to the parenting course, I find it to be extremely beneficial. Even just by attending half a day (I had class this morning) I have learnt a lot and I look forward to learning more tomorrow. I believe that as a parent, we all try our best for our children and often times there may be occasions that we feel guilty due to certain actions that we make (well, I know I do). There even may be people who (gleefully) point out what they deem to be "mistakes" that we are making. Believe me when I say, if you are doing you're best, Allah knows and inshaa Allah things will turn out to be the best. But when things get hard, make dua'a because a mother's dua'a for the child is the best dua'a. Imam al-Sudais credits his mom to be the cause of him becoming the Imam of the Haram and even Imam al-Bukhari (who was blind as a child) was able given back sight because of his mother's tenacity in making dua'a. Especially when you are angry at your child (due to whatever mischief that they have managed to land themselves in) that is the best times to make dua'a, and this is as evidenced by Imam al-Sudais. He mentioned that whenever he made mischief and made his mom angry, his mom would say,  May Allah make you the Imam of the Haram. Mashaa Allah, her words came true. 

Am definitely going to practice word association with Alexa. May Allah make her a hafiza (memoriser of the Quran), Ameen!

To becoming better parents. 

xoxo Mrs Fashionista 

Al-Fatihah Mak

Sometimes you meet extra-ordinary individuals, under the guise of the ordinary life. And I must say, my late mother-in-law is just one of those individuals.

Quiet and unassuming, she always kept to herself and never imposed on anyone. Many would underestimate her strength and character but after listening to many of her stories on her childhood, I knew that she did not have an easy life.

She was orphaned when she was small (both parents passed away when she was still a child), and had never undergone proper schooling and education; even then she never blamed her childhood or circumstances for everything that she went through. Indeed, she fought hard for what she wants; when she was a teen she decided to study Quran recitation properly with a religious teacher and because of that, she had to take a boat to cross the Sarawak river and then walk a couple of miles so that she'd be able to reach the place where the teacher staying. Suffice to say she completed her studies and continued to teach others within her community.

I did not spend much time with her unfortunately, simply because I was too busy with life and the many things that were put upon my shoulders. But within the few years that I knew her, she has been extremely kind to me, and just as loving to Alexa. In our last conversation over the phone, I was leaving for Kuala Lumpur then, just 5 days after Aidilfitri because I had an exam to attend to and she was crying because she didn't get the chance to cook for me. I guess maybe she knew her time was coming to an end. She was hospitalised just over a week later and succumbed to her illness on the 18th of August 2015. She passed away just a little over a year after my late father-in-law.

Alexa with my sister-in-law, late mother-in-law, and brother-in-law just two months before she passed away.

I could only hope that I would be able to be the kind of mother that she was, strong, patient and pious. She never had a bad word to say about anyone. Even when others treated her badly (there were many incidences in the past), she would forgive them and leave the matters to Allah. May Allah place her in the highest level of Jannah and protect her from the trials of the grave. Ameen.

Al Fatihah Mak, Hajah Dayang Aieshah Awang Hamid, 1946 - 2015.


xoxo Mrs Fashionista

Thank You to the Medical Staff at Sarawak General Hospital

Last Saturday, my mother-in-law suffered a heart attack. She had suffered a few complications a few months earlier arising from various factors such as a weak heart and diabetes and this caused her to be on medication and regular check-ups with the hospital. 

My view whenever I am with her. 

Am extremely thankful to all the medical staff of Sarawak General Hospital.

She has yet to recover from the heart attack and the past week have seen me flying back to Kuching and helping out the family with taking care for her at the hospital. Usually our shift would entail us (me and hubs) to take over the graveyard shift as hubs has to work during the day and he's only able to be at the hospital after office hours. During my stay with her, I have seen the staff of the Sarawak General Hospital doing their work with the highest level of efficiency and courtesy. Despite working until wee hours in the morning (usually I'd be awake from 9 or 10 pm until 3 - 4 am in the morning to make way for hubs to sleep so that he'd be able to work the next day) and even then the medical staff have been very attentive and professional in conducting their work. Despite my mom-in-law being unconscious, they always greeted her before doing their work on her (from changing the sheets to checking up on her vitals and feeding her). They would always tell her before hand what they will be doing to her and warning her beforehand that it might hurt a little (this is especially true when they are changing her tubes, taking blood sample for tests etc). 

So this is our thanks to the doctors and medical staff at Level 8, Ladies Ward, Sarawak General Hospital. Thank you for being so attentive to our mom, thank you for your proficiency, efficiency and all the help that you have provided and may Allah repay your deeds with the best of rewards. 

My mom in law still has a long way to go in terms of recovery but thank you for making her recovery as comfortable as you can. May Allah grant her the best in this dunya and the hereafter. Ameen. 

xoxo Mrs Fashionista

Happy New Year 2015!

Uh oh, hullo there!

*cough*cough*

*dust*dust*

*achoo!*

Oh well, I haven't been active lately, and there are many reasons for that. And there are a lot things that have happened the past year (2014 I mean) for me to share, so I am at lost on which news do I share first...

So just a brief update on what's been happening in 2014:

We cancelled our trip to Japan last April due to my father-in-law's passing just a day before the trip and we weren't able to reschedule our trip to another date due to many other events that happened in the second half of the year.

Our last family photo together during Eid 2013.

We traveled to Ho Chi Minh (Vietnam) at the end of August (until early September) and got robbed by a cab driver (a fake cabbie, actually). I will definitely update a blog on that so that all you out there will be able to recognise the signs of a fake cabbie. That is the first time we've been robbed on our trip overseas and it got me spooked because Alexa was also in the cab with us and I was afraid that the cab driver would harm her. However, on the bright side, inshaa Allah I will post a blog on halal food in Vietnam soon =).

Us in front of Saigon Notre-Dame Basilica

I've enrolled as a student again! Weehooo! It's always been my dream to pursue a PhD and I've enrolled at an institution called INCEIF (will do a review on INCEIF soon) and have been approved to pursue my studies full time by my organisation (the institution at which I am employed) and inshaa Allah will be at INCEIF until September 2016. Do wish me luck in my studies ya!

With Prof. Zubair Hasan after our final class for Islamic Economics.

I've bought another apartment (I don't know what is it with me and real estate, but I do love owning properties and the rental in Kuala Lumpur is so high that I guess buying an apartment is a better alternative for me). So this apartment (it's nothing fancy, just a studio apartment that suit my current needs as a student) is for me to stay while I'm doing my PhD and unfortunately for privacy reasons, I won't be able to disclose the location of this apartment until it's ready to be rented out in the future =).

Attended the Divine Speech seminar by Ustadh Nouman Ali Khan. His talks are even more impressive live and if given the chance, I would love to attend future sessions with him as the speaker (the only other speaker that I would love to listen live would be Dr Zakir Naik, inshaa Allah).

The venue, PICC, was filled to the max, wow!

I have also enrolled as a student of Al-Maghrib Institute and this is one of my personal development goals and one of the ways I would be able to enhance my knowledge in Islam. Considering Al Maghrib's courses are only conducted once every three to four months, I don't think this course will in any way interfere with my PhD inshaa Allah. Here's a post on the first program of theirs that I attended [click here].

Me, mum and my sis-in-law, Izzah attending our first Al-Maghrib seminar =)

We got our paper published in a journal, a collaboration effort of three academicians, my friend Erimalida aka Ayon, yours truly and Assoc. Prof. Dr. Song Saw Imm. All praise be to Allah for the opportunity =).

So in a nutshell, 2014 have been a very interesting year and am looking forward to an exiting 2015. Here's a sneak peak of what's in store:

So far my plans are only up to January and February so I still don't know what's in store for the other ten (10) months in 2015...

January - a short trip to Penang to visit my Pakistani friend Azima followed by attending Al-Maghrib's Fiqh of Chillin' course the following week. Then a weekend trip to Singapore to attend another of Al-Maghrib's course: Deception, Study of Shaytaan. This month will end with a much-anticipated holiday to Xi'an, China with hubs and lil' bub, Alexa =).

February - we'll be back from Xi'an in early February and I've bought tickets to attend a Marriage Conference on the 14th of February (which I'm excited to attend due to the impressive line up of speakers who are scheduled to speak in the conference).

So here's my plan for 2015. There's not much activities/ events planned out as I plan to focus on my studies and would need time for my coursework and research. But I am hoping (if possible) to present (my papers/ research) at two conferences this year, one in March and another in June, inshaa Allah =).


Here's to a fantabulous 2015! *clink*

Cheers!


xoxo Mrs Fashionista

Al-Fatihah Ayah

In loving memory of:

Raden Alwie bin Raden Yusop

10 May 1944 - 10 April 2014. 

10 Jamadilakhir 1435H.

Having planned our trip to Tokyo (the trip was planned to coincide with hubs birthday on the 12th of April) for many months,  we've decided to pack Alexa's bag first, considering she'll need more stuff than we do and also to ensure that if we've forgotten anything, packing the bag would definitely help us to remember what else we need for her. So, we've packed her bag on Tuesday night and set Wednesday night for us to get some of the stuff that she needs (i.e. socks, toiletries set, extra wet wipes etc). 

We decided it would be easier for Alexa's stuff to be in one bag so that if we need anything for her, we'd can look for it here.

A friend of ours, Nur Syarfeeza mentioned that Tokyo would be slightly chilly (according to the weather app in my iPhone the temperature in Tokyo is somewhere between 8 - 14 degrees celcius) and reminded us to pack warm clothes, so we prepared her travelling outfit with the weather in mind. Having been to London during spring a few years ago reminded us not to underestimate the cool weather so we prepared an extra jacket for her. 

On Thursday morning, 10th of April, at almost 6 am, we received a phone call from hub's sister, and the sound of her voice is one that I will never forget. The painful anguish of a daughter calling to inform her elder brother that their father have passed away. Indeed the whole world came crashing down on us at this one single moment, we cannot believe that someone who is as active as he is, had suddenly left us, leaving us to go back into the arms of our creator.

Shaken with shock, we quickly got into action and went to hub's family residence to help out with the funeral arrangements.

We are definitely thankful for the help from the committee of Surau Kampung Surabaya Hilir, getting ready to clean and cloth the deceased's body for the last time.

Yassin recitation for the deceased. 

Solat jenazah. 

His final resting place at Tanah Perkuburan Islam, Samariang.

In Islam, we believe that everything we have are borrowed from Allah. We do not own anything, we borrow them from Allah and Allah is the rightful owner, our body, our life, our family, our wealth, our health, all are given by Allah and should Allah wills it, all can be taken away in the blink of an eye. That is why we are accountable to all that have been given to us, we are accountable as to how we behave to others, we are accountable to our body (ensuring our health), we are accountable for our wealth and how it has been spent, we are accountable to the relationships that we have with others, in short, we are accountable for every single thing that we say or do. 

In the same manner, as we are living on borrowed time, Ayah's (this is what we call him) time with us is up. No matter how sad I am at his passing, knowing that we have lost him, knowing that Alexa will never get to know her Atok (as he calls himself), knowing that the future now will be different, how he has left such a huge gap in our lives... In a way I am glad and thankful. I am thankful to Allah for giving me the opportunity to get to know this amazing man, this person who has taken me into his life as his daughter-in-law, this quiet person who has been such an amazing father to my husband, who has taught him the values and principles that has made him what he is today, this simple man who adores that simple things in life and is eternally grateful for the little blessings that he has been granted with. I am eternally grateful to Allah for the time that has been granted to us in having him in our lives.  

Hubs and his parents and siblings during Eid 2012.

The grandfather, Raden Alwie bin Raden Yusop and his granddaughter, Raden Alexa Iqlima binti Raden Chekra Muda in January 2014, a few months after his operation, removing tumor from his brain.

Al Fatihah to my father-in-law Raden Alwie bin Raden Yusop. May Allah grant you Jannah and when the time comes, we will join you in the afterlife.

xoxo Mrs Fashionista