Introducing Raden Isabel Asiya

So I've been busy lately. I haven't been able to update my blog due to me having shifted my priorities and making my PhD my number one priority these days. Any other events, have to take a backseat, unless of course, it involves birth and labor, which, like it or not, have to be the number one priority when the time comes.

Us in Sri Lanka, June 2016.

Anyway, we (me and hubs, obviously) discovered that I was pregnant after we came home from our trip to Sri Lanka in June. Alhamdulillah we've always wanted another child and we are extremely grateful to be granted another opportunity. Fast forward months later, just like my pregnancy with Alexa, the baby is 40 weeks overdue and there is a high chance of me undergoing a caesarian as not only the baby is overdue, but I also have gestational diabetes, which poses a risk to the baby.

Since I was overdue, and although the baby was already engaged, my cervix wasn't dilated as yet. My doctor suggested that I go for a balloon catheter induction which is available at the Sarawak General Hospital (SGH) which would give me a chance to proceed with normal delivery. Otherwise, the alternative would be a caesarian delivery.

Because we were rooting for a normal delivery, we decided to try the balloon induction and my ob-gyn proceeded with a referral letter for SGH. On Thursday, 28th January I packed my stuff and then proceeded to SGH for the induction, and prayed for a normal delivery. Registered at the labor ward (Level 4) at 9 pm and my condition was examined by a doctor a few minutes later. She reported the results of her examination to a senior doctor about an hour later. The senior doctor conducted a vaginal examination and declared that my cervix was 3 cm dilated and that I did not need an induction. She even declared that I would deliver the following morning. Little did I know that she was right in her prediction.

The tiny person who's hijacked my sleep (for now).

At 12 midnight, I was wheeled to Level 5, given a bed and a change of clothes and was informed that if I felt any contraction or feel that I am nearing labor, I could request for a vaginal examination. If (based on the examination) my cervix was dilated to 4 cm, I would be brought to the delivery room at Level 4. By 2 am I was ready for bed; I had performed my prayers and there were some Braxton Hicks, but nothing to be alarmed about. By 4 am, the pain started to get more intense, so I asked the nurse for a vaginal exam. The nurse said that I had already dilated to 5 cm and would be wheeled to the delivery room once they had an available bed. 20 minutes later, I was in the delivery room, strapped with to a fetal monitor and by that time, the contractions were quite intense that I actually had asked the doctor for epidural.

The nurses proceeded to fill in some forms, asked me a couple of questions which (in my dazed state) some I was able to answer while the rest, I mumbled incoherent words. With almost zero sleep, an empty stomach and parched throat, I wasn't exactly on cloud nine. At 6.30 am, the anaesthetist came and proceeded to warn me the risks of an epidural. I insisted that I wanted an epidural. She then told me to sit up (I was lying down all this while), to which I tried to do with much difficulty. I then told her that I can't sit up properly because I felt a strong urge to poop. She told me to lie down and then informed another doctor to perform a vaginal exam to check if my cervix was fully dilated. Surprise, surprise, it was fully dilated to 10 cm and I (apparently) was in labor. Obviously, I did not get the epidural (much to the relief of the anaesthetist).

All of a sudden the delivery room was filled with nurses and they proceeded to cheer me to push when I feel a contraction coming. As a newbie (my first born was delivered via c-section), I wasn't able to push well, and the lack of sleep and lack of food obviously did not help my condition. The baby came out after three or four pushes later at 7.16 am, weighing 3.47 kg. Alhamdulillah, I only suffered a second degree tear and did not require any episiotomy. But I do need some stitches.

Raden Isabel Asiya, three hours after birth. Hubs liked the name Bella so we decided on Isabel which means devoted to God and Asiya is the wife of the Pharaoh and one of those who is promised Jannah (refer to the Quran, 66:11) or you can also read a Facebook post about her (click here).

Hubs came in to the delivery room a few minutes later. He wasn't allowed to come in during the delivery because at 7 am, nurses and doctors would change shifts and while they hand over their tasks to the incoming medical team, no visitors are allowed until the new shift has settled in. Post birth, the nurses proceeded with allowing me to breastfeed Isabel right after the stitches were done.

Our first selfie, Day 1 of Raden Isabel Asiya.

So all praise be to Allah for granting me the VBAC (vaginal birth after caesarian) which I so desperately wanted, granting my wish of a vaginal delivery without episiotomy (which I kept praying for as well) and allowing me to breastfeed Isabel after birth as well.

And for those who are preparing for birth, here are some of the things that I did to prepare myself for birth:

1. Exercise - Towards the 9th month, I'd walk a couple of kilometres (almost) every day to ensure that my body is in optimum condition. Exercising not only helps during birth (we need our muscles to push), but also helps us to recover faster. Other than walking, in the final month, I did squats 100 times a day and also kegel exercises to ensure that my pelvic muscles are strong.

2. Educate myself - I have attended a hypnobirthing class before with Sister Nadine Ghows, and proceeded with a short refresher with Cikgu Chris in December. This really helped me to practice deep breathing (during the initial Braxton Hicks and in between contractions). The visualisation technique from the class also helped and without it, I do think I would be in a different state during birth.

3. Make dua'a - I made a LOT of dua'as during my pregnancy and even the night before delivery. I am a firm believer that Allah will grant you what you ask for (unless it is not the best for you, of course) and Alhamdulillah, I got what I asked for and more.

4. Perineal Massage - Unfortunately I did not do this enough. I only managed to attempt a perineal massage a couple of times before delivery. I personally think that if done consistently, you could avoid (or minimise) the tear in your perineum during delivery.

5. Aromatherapy oils - I am extremely grateful to Cikgu Chris for providing me with aromatherapy oils a couple of weeks before the delivery. I used them everyday and I do think they helped to quicken the labor as well as help me to be in a calmer state of mind during delivery.

6. Proper diet - I read somewhere that pregnant women who eat (at least six) dates everyday have shorter labor than those who didn't. So I included dates in my daily breakfast and although I am not sure how short is a short labour, mine was a little over 3 hours so to me I suppose the dates did help.

And that is my birth story with Raden Isabel Asiya. Those who would like to know more about hypnobirthing, you can check out Nadine's class at Gentle Beginnings (click here) or Cikgu Chris's class at Borneo Bellies, Birth and Babies (click here). Inshaa Allah once I have the time, I'll update my review on giving birth at SGH soon (I hope).


xoxo Mrs Fashionista

Fashionista's Review: Birthing Experience at Normah Medical Specialist Centre

I've been wanting to write this post ever since I've gave birth but having very limited time (I guess you might have noticed the lack of updates in my blog *sigh*), I guess now is as good a time as any so let me share with you my review on Normah Medical Specialist Centre (Normah for short), the hospital where I gave birth to Alexa.

 

Before you read on, let me first just say that I have NEVER been admitted to a hospital before, I rarely get sick and even if I do, I very seldom visit the doctor because usually I'd get better within a day or two. Mostly my frequent visits to the doctor would usually mean that I've got diarrhea or food poisoning. So this birthing experience would have to be my first admission to a hospital.

 

We selected Normah simply because hubs company covers for birth and after asking around, most of his colleagues recommended the hospital, and they even recommended the gynae which I have been seeing in the duration of my pregnancy, Dr Suria Idris. Unfortunately Dr Suria was away during my labor, I was attended by Dr Azah instead.

 

 

We had booked a twin sharing room, one of the bed is for me and the other is for hubs. For one thing is to ensure privacy, with the amount of people coming and going from my room, I don't think having a roommate is a good idea and for another thing, this keeps hubs close and comfortable as he can sleep in the other bed. In retrospect, I consider this as one of the best decisions that we've ever made. We had to stay at Normah for about 4 days (because I had to recover from my C-section operation so having an extra bed for hubs is definitely handy).

 

 

Normah provided me with a toiletry kit and this includes a travel toothbrush and toothpaste, a small face towel, a plastic cup and a pair of spoon and fork for me to have my food. How very thoughtful =). I particularly like the plastic cup as it enables you to measure how much you drink in ounces and milliliter (and this cup helps especially when you need to drink medicine and stuff that needs measuring).

 

 

They also gave Alexa a free baby bag and some baby stuff. I'd say this would be Alexa's first experience at a marketing campaign for baby products *haha*.

 

 

Here's Alexa, wheeled straight to our room about 15 minutes after I arrived in the room post C-section. She came home with this lovely blanket, also provided by Normah.

 

What you should know about Normah (although as time progress, changes could have been made therefore what you'll experience if you choose to deliver at Normah could be different than what I have experienced):
1. There are two midwives (usually working in shifts) so during my delivery, I was attended by a different midwife during the day and another during the night. Usually a midwife would attend to you until the delivery stage is near, only then your gynae would be called for.
2. The nursing staff would actually come to your room every morning and evening to inform you that the previous shift has ended and also to introduce to you the ones who will be available for the next shift. I actually liked this the most as it enables me to get to know who to call and I think it also helps the nurses to identify with the patients better.
3. The gynae (in this case Dr Azah) came to visit me and update on my condition several times a day, usually in the morning, right after lunch and early evening.
4. The pediatrician (Dr Alex) would visit us early in the morning and update us on Alexa's condition and also updating on any medical procedures that he has to do on Alexa (like administer a vaccine and stuff).

What I liked about giving birth at Normah is that for one, it was an absolutely comfortable experience. I got as much rest as I needed, the nurses were there to help change me (I literally felt like a baby), and they also gave me a body wipe the morning after the operation. I had wobbly feet (due to anesthetics) so I wasn't able to move much the morning after, but later in the afternoon the doctor advised me to walk as much as I can to aid my recovery so I did as much walking exercise as I could in the privacy of the room. I could call on the nurses any time and also requested them to bring Alexa into my room whenever I want. Alexa was put in a nursery then and as much as I've learnt about skin to skin and gentle birthing, I would have to admit that as a first time mom who's undergone her first ever major operation, I don't think having Alexa in the room right after the operation is a good idea. I could barely even move what more to say on caring for a newborn baby. Although I would have to say that knowing what I know now, it would be a good idea if the baby rooms in with you (and they do allow the baby to room in with you) but as someone recovering from surgery, maybe it would also be prudent for you to make sure you're capable of handling the baby (i.e. carrying the baby etc) to make sure that you don't accidentally injure the baby.

What I don't like about giving birth at Normah for one is the lack of privacy. There's only a curtain separating the labor room and the corridor and you could hear every pitter patter of feet, every conversation, everything that's happening in the corridor and that really does not help you to relax and focus on giving birth. Another thing that I didn't like is the labor bed itself and how labor is conducted, it's not very conducive to birthing. As birthing experts have mentioned, giving birth while laying flat on your back is not easy. I tried to lie on my side but that was not easy too as I was dripped on Pitocin (to induce labor) and the fetal doppler got in the way and I couldn't properly lie on my side either. I think the inability to relax could have contributed to the baby's increased stress as it made it's way down the birthing canal.

What I should have done; on one part I did know that Dr Suria wasn't able to attend to me and another doctor would be attending to my delivery, I should have actually enquired to meet the doctor and at least build rapport with her so that I'd be more comfortable during labor. Failing to build a relationship with the doctor actually added to my apprehension and nervousness. I do think that should I have met the doctor before and discussed with her what my concerns are, some of those fears would have been alleviated. So, I'm taking note on this one and will certainly take precautions to get to know who I'm going into labor with.

So the question is, would I give birth a second time at Normah? Definitely I would. I love the relationship that I have with my gynae, Dr Suria. She's an amazing doctor with an absolutely relaxed attitude to birthing (which helped calmed down my jitters). I also love their service and the attentiveness of the nurses and doctors when I was there. A few days after birth hubs mentioned that I looked absolutely fresh and rested despite just having given birth via C-section.

However I must admit that if there's another hospital offering better birthing possibilities (i.e. birthing in a tub or side lying at least) in Kuching, I would be tempted to try those. After all, it's our body that's experiencing the labor pain and knowing that I have to live the rest of my life with a C-section scar (hopefully this will be the one and only C-section scar for me), I'd better look for the best birthing possible for my next delivery.

Hope my review helps other expecting mommies out there.


xoxo Mrs Fashionista

Do note that as a private hospital, nothing is free at Normah. They will charge for everything that they give to you including each and every needle used, every cotton ball, medicine/ drug administered, the maternity pads, even the blanket and toiletry set.

Fashionista Mommy Adventures: Hypnobirthing Class

Motherhood has indeed opened my eyes to a whole new world and as a newbie, I am definitely excited to learn new things. Having planned for a vaginal birth and ended up with a caesarian (you can read all about my giving birth story here), I am definitely apprehensive for my second one (no, I am not pregnant yet but it's never too early to start preparations for birth, especially when I am planning for a VBAC).

So imagine how excited I am when I learnt of a hypnobirthing course that was to be conducted in Kuching and despite me having given birth just seven months ago and am advised by the doctor to plan for another one at least a year and a half after the previous birth, I decided to enrol for the course. I believe as part of my effort in ensuring the success of a VBAC, I need to take a proactive role in getting to learn what are the risks involved, toning and exercising my body so that it is strong and able to perform a VBAC, taking care of the food that I eat (I am well known for my happy food choices instead of healthy food *blush*) and of course at the end of the day it all depends on what God has in plan for us, I do believe my first caesarian is the best birthing experience for me and Alexa (I had prayed for the best birth for both of us) and if I've tried my all and still have to do a caesarian, maybe God has planned it that way. But, that (fate) does not stop me from trying.

I learnt about the course from a support group that I joined in Facebook (you can look up the group here), made my payment and waited for the day to come. It's a two-day intensive course with loads of open discussions, video presentations and hands-on breathing exercises. The program starts at 9.30 in the morning and ends at 5 pm. In between we have a lunch break from 12.30 pm until 2.15 pm.

Handouts

The hypnobirthing book.

Upon registration, I was given a file filled with handouts, hypnobirthing book (attached with its own CD) and another relaxation CD, plopped myself on a very comfortable sofa and waited for the session to start. There were only five other people in the room, Mellona (who's about 34 weeks pregnant) and her husband (it's supposed to be a couples course but hubs couldn't make it as he wasn't able to leave work), Latifah (not pregnant), Lilian (currently expecting her third child), yours truly (not pregnant) and Nadine (our speaker/ facilitator, and I actually did manage to ask her whether she's expecting *hehe*). You might notice that it's such a small number of participants for an intensive course, but the good thing is, we get to share our stories and experiences with each other and the course felt as if it's very personalised and the best part is, Nadine get to teach and also let us practice each breathing techniques and exercises individually, and with each other.

This is kinda how the course was conducted. And if you're wondering about those mats, yes we did get a chance to roll on them *haha*.

There's Mellona, her husband and Latifah, rapt attention focused on Nadine.

During one of the hands-on activity session, Nadine and Latifah.

Chris presenting a cake to Nadine by the end of the course. Yummylicious! Thank you Chris for the cake!

I'm not going to share much about the course here as I do believe that the best way for you to gain information on hypnobirthing is by attending the course. However, I've come to the conclusion that:

1.  Should I have attended this course before the birth of Alexa, I could have prevented an induction, ethanol and epidural pain relief, even possibly experience a vaginal birth simply by practicing the exercise and breathing techniques that was taught during the course. Note to self: am getting the birth ball soon.

2. I would have known more on deliveries, especially those related to the natural birthing process and water birth (we were shown plenty of videos on those and surprisingly I wasn't squeamish by all of it).

3. I would most probably have felt calmer during my giving birth experience (truth be told, one of the things that terrified me was the possibility of getting an episiotomy).

The course taught me that it is possible to experience and embrace a natural birth and I would have to say among all the things I have done relating to pregnancy and giving birth, this course would have to be the best investment in ensuring the possibility of a gentle birth a reality (I'll definitely share on my second birth experience when I get my second one in the future). I really recommend this course for first-time mothers (or even second, third, fourth time mothers), medical practitioners (so that they know gentle birth does not necessary mean home birth) and also to fathers as well (as they would be the ones in the labor room supporting their wife through the birthing experience).

Interested to know more? You can look up Nadine's website on gentle birth [here]. Seriously, the best investment you could ever make is an investment in yourself and this is one investment you should not miss. If you're wondering about the cost, we paid for about RM800 for the two day course and early birds get to pay only RM780.

Looking forward to a better birthing experience, not only to me but to all mothers out there.


xoxo Mrs Fashionista

The Birth that wasn't Planned

In my previous post I did mention that I've prepared a birth plan, right? So this is what actually happened during the birth of my first child...

She (it's a girl by the way) was supposed to be due on the 27th of May and with much anticipation and trepidation we made our way to the hospital (complete with our two overnight bags and baby car seat installed in the car). Met the doctor about two hours later and was informed that my cervix has already dilated by about 3 cm, and since the baby's heartbeat and movements are strong, she told me to go back home and come again within two days (hoping that the baby will be ready to be delivered by then). Before leaving the hospital, the doctor did a stretch and sweep to artificially stimulate the birthing process.

We went back to the hospital on the 29th of May at 11 am, checked into the labor ward and the doctor proceeded to check the dilation of my cervix. Still 3 cm, there's no indication of me going into labor for the past 2 days (even though I tried my hardest to walk up and down the stairs and everywhere but the baby is maybe just not ready to come out yet). So the doctor proceeded to break my amniotic sac so that we can proceed to the next stage of delivery. At 2.30 pm, I was brought to the labor room and connected intravenously to Pitocin, in an effort to start contractions (to which I had only been feeling Braxton-Hicks contractions so far).

I only started feeling contractions by 5 pm. It wasn't strong at first, and since I already had a birth plan ready, the doctor readied ethonox and the midwife showed me how to use it. By half an hour the contractions were getting stronger. I suddenly got the urge to pee (I get that sometimes especially when I'm nervous) so I asked if it's possible for me to go to the loo. At that time I was already lying on my back in the labor room, with Pitocin being dripped intravenously through my left hand (this means that it would be difficult for me to go to the loo). The nurse then supplied me with a bedpan and asked me to pee into it (while lying down). I swear that it is the most humiliating experience I've ever had to endure in my entire life. They (the nurse, doctor and mister hubby) left the room so that I can conduct my business in private. I tried peeing (while lying down, mind you) and was successful (I did manage to pee but it was definitely difficult). Five minutes later, the nurse, doctor and husband came back into the labor room.

The pain started getting worse (I'm sure those who've gone through induction before would be able to relate to what I'm experiencing) so I started using Ethonox as a way to alleviate the pain. About 45 minutes later I gave up and requested for an epidural. The epidural was injected about half an hour later and I stopped feeling contraction pains (well, it didn't really blocked out the whole thing but at least it wasn't as painful). By this time, my cervix had already dilated to 5 cm.

At around 7.30 pm, the doctor noticed that the baby's heartbeat was getting weaker and weaker. She told me that she's optimistic that my cervix will be fully dilated in about 2 - 3 hours but the possibility of normal birth would also have to be dependent on the baby's heartbeat. If her heartbeat's too low, we wouldn't be able to wait for the cervix to fully dilate, we'd have to immediately go for emergency caesarian. At this moment, I knew that the life of my baby would be of utmost importance to me and told the doctor to proceed with whatever is best for the baby.

I was wheeled off to the operation theatre by 8 pm.

There was a flutter of activity around me (I didn't know what was happening as my view was blocked by a sheet of cloth); what I remember most is that the room was extremely cold (my body was shivering due to the cold and my teeth was chattering). The doctor and all the attendees was swift in doing their job and baby Alexa came into this world at 8.40 pm.

So, things didn't go the way that I planned and truth be told, I was extremely disappointed that I didn't have a normal birthing experience. The experience that I had undergone left me traumatic (at first). During the first few days post delivery I even thought that I wouldn't want to undergo labor again (that thought have changed now that I've had to experience motherhood, I'm looking forward to having more in the future).

Now that I'm in confinement, in retrospect, I do feel that maybe I was destined for a caesarian.  Although the pain (post operation) was rather unbearable on the first day but I managed to start walking (well waddling like a penguin at least) the next morning by 11 am (after they've removed the IV and catheter. Walking was difficult, peeing/ going to the loo was awkward (I felt like I've lost my ability to control my pee), and the feeling of living with a scar is definitely not what I signed up for.

I'm recuperating nicely, by the way. I kinda felt a whole lot better since I checked out of the hospital (at Day 4) and by Day 8, the thought of a c-section is insignificant compared to the precious gift that I have been blessed with.

Here's baby Alexa at 2 hours old. Oh, by the way, her name is Raden Alexa Iqlima. Raden is hub's lineage so we had to retain that name; she's named after Alexa Chung and Iqlima is the name of the daughter of our first Prophet, Adam a.s.

I'm definitely loving motherhood, it's tiring and demanding, but definitely satisfying. We are definitely blessed. And I can't wait to share my reviews on the baby and mommy products that I've bought (and used) and also what I've learnt as a mother.

Toodles peeps!


xoxo Mrs Fashionista